Run: 2026-03-18-01KM08M9FZT2R3WHHBJ5B54SS2

Run Details

Duration:
20.2s
Cost:
$0.017621
Provider:
OpenAI

Model input

System
You are an expert novelist with a gift for vivid, immersive prose. You write in tight third-person limited point of view with a strong narrative voice. Your prose is clean, precise, and engaging — you favor strong verbs, concrete details, and natural-sounding dialogue. You will be given a story bible (codex) containing canonical details about characters, locations, items, and lore. Use these details to ground your writing in the established world. Stay consistent with the codex. Write only the prose of the scene. Do not include titles, chapter headings, markdown formatting, or any commentary before or after the scene.
User/Human
<codex> <character id="4412" name="Aurora Carter" aliases="Rory, Laila, Aurora, Carter, Malphora" pronouns="she/her" species="Human" storyRole="Protagonist"> <eyeColor>bright blue</eyeColor> <hair>straight shoulder-length black</hair> <height>5'6"</height> <age>25</age> <scar>small crescent-shaped scar on her left wrist from a childhood accident</scar> <description>Aurora, referred to by her friends as Rory, is cool-headed, intelligent, and known for quick out-of-the-box thinking.</description> <backstory>Born in Cardiff to an Irish barrister father (Brendan Carter) and Welsh teacher mother (Jennifer Carter née Ellis), Rory reluctantly pursued Pre-Law at Cardiff University. She fled to London at the behest of her childhood friend Eva after leaving an abusive ex named Evan. By day, Rory works part-time as a delivery person for Yu-Fei Cheung's Golden Empress restaurant. She lives in a flat above Silas' bar.</backstory> </character> <character id="4413" name="Silas Blackwood" aliases="Silas, Si, the Spymaster" pronouns="he/him" species="Human" storyRole="Mentor"> <eyeColor>hazel</eyeColor> <hair>grey-streaked auburn</hair> <height>6'1"</height> <age>58</age> <beard>neatly trimmed, matching his grey-streaked auburn hair</beard> <limp>slight limp in his left leg from an old knee injury</limp> <signetRing>silver signet ring, always worn on his right hand</signetRing> <description>Silas is a retired intelligence operative turned bar owner. He carries himself with quiet authority.</description> <backstory>Former MI6 field agent who retired after a botched operation in Prague left him with a permanent knee injury. He opened "The Raven's Nest" bar in Soho as a front for his network of contacts.</backstory> </character> <location id="854" name="The Raven's Nest" aliases="the Nest, Raven, Silas' bar" realm="Earth"> <signColor>distinctive green neon sign above the entrance</signColor> <secretRoom>hidden back room accessible through a bookshelf, used for clandestine meetings</secretRoom> <description>A dimly lit bar in Soho, London. The walls are covered with old maps and black-and-white photographs.</description> </location> </codex> Write a fully fleshed out scene of at least 1000 words in the literary fiction genre. Two old friends who haven't seen each other in years run into each other unexpectedly at a bar. One of them has changed significantly. Through their conversation and the tension between who they were and who they've become, reveal the weight of time and unspoken regret. Use the codex entries above as your world reference for characters and setting. Only include the prose of the scene without any markdown or commentary.

Model response

AI
The green neon sign above The Raven’s Nest buzzed in the drizzle like a trapped insect, throwing a sickly emerald wash across the pavement. Rory came in under it with her hood half up, one hand already inside the delivery bag, counting the usual irritations: the late hour, the wet roads, the fact that Yu-Fei’s soup containers always found a way to betray gravity at the worst possible moment. She was thinking about that and nothing more when the warmth of the bar hit her face, thick with beer, old wood, and the sharp metallic bite of rain dragged in on coats. Silas looked up from behind the bar as she shut the door with her heel. “Late,” he said. “Traffic.” Rory peeled the delivery ticket from the bag and set it on the counter. “The universe conspiring against dumplings.” Silas’s mouth twitched, the closest thing he had to laughter. The light above him caught in the grey in his auburn hair and turned it silver at the edges. He wore his usual dark shirt, sleeves rolled, silver signet ring glinting on his right hand as he reached for the receipt. His left leg took a fraction more weight as he shifted, the old injury making itself known in the smallest possible way. “You’re dripping on my floor.” “You’re welcome.” Rory pushed damp hair back from her face and glanced over his shoulder toward the room. The Raven’s Nest was the same as always, dim and watchful. Old maps climbed the walls in cracked frames; black-and-white photographs peered down from above the bottles like family portraits of ghosts. The low lamps made everyone look as though they were already half-remembered. A few regulars hunched over pints in the far booths. Someone near the jukebox was laughing too loudly, the sound roughened by drink. From the back, beyond the bookshelf that hid the secret room, came the faint murmur of voices she couldn’t make out. Silas slid her payment across to her. “Yu-Fei wants you to keep delivering at this hour, she ought to pay hazard.” “She says the hazard is part of the charm.” “Yu-Fei would say fire was part of the charm if it improved business.” Rory snorted, then paused because the room had gone strangely still around one table near the window. Not silent—bars never truly went silent—but thinned, as if the noise had stepped back to make room for something else. A man had turned in his seat. At first she knew only the shape of him: broad shoulders under a dark wool coat, hair darker than she remembered and trimmed short instead of falling in the loose curls of youth. He was older, of course; they both were. But some recognitions arrived through the body before the mind could lie about them. His profile caught under the amber light, and the years folded abruptly, badly, like paper creasing at the wrong seam. Ned. Her fingers tightened on the delivery bag strap. He saw her a second later. His expression changed so quickly it was almost nothing, a flicker of shock and disbelief across a face she had once known with embarrassing intimacy. Then his mouth parted slightly, as though he had been about to speak and found the whole language missing. Rory stood very still. The last time she had seen Ned, she had been twenty-two and desperate enough to mistake motion for escape. Cardiff in winter, a bus shelter with broken glass underfoot, her own voice too high and brittle as she said, Don’t call me again. He had looked at her as if she’d struck him. She had wanted him to fight harder then, wanted him to know something she could not name. Instead, he had gone pale and let her leave. Now he was older in a way that mattered. Not just the lines at the corners of his eyes or the faint weathering at his mouth. He had the controlled stillness of someone who’d learned to keep his hands where they could be seen. There was a faint scar cutting through one eyebrow. His left hand rested on the table with the ease of habit, but she saw the tension there, the awareness. As if he, too, had spent years learning rooms before entering them. He stood. Rory hated the way her pulse jumped. “Rory,” he said. No one had called her that in years except Silas and Eva, and hearing it in Ned’s voice made her feel abruptly and absurdly young, all elbows and bad decisions. Silas, mercifully, said nothing. He only wiped the same glass twice and watched over the rim. Rory said, because some stupid part of her had always been proud, “Ned.” He smiled then, and the smile was not the one she remembered. It was smaller, edged with caution, as though he didn’t trust it to survive. “I wasn’t sure it was you.” “Clearly.” “You look—” “Don’t.” The word came out sharper than she meant. She softened it with an exhale, though her chest had already tightened. “Don’t do that.” He nodded once, as if he understood the rule without needing it translated. He had always been better at that than she gave him credit for. “You work here?” he asked, glancing past her to Silas. “No. I deliver for the restaurant down the road. I’m just dropping off food and taking my life choices with me.” She heard the dryness in her own voice and clung to it like a railing. “What are you doing in Soho?” A shadow crossed his face so fast most people would’ve missed it. “In town for work.” “You got vague.” She folded her arms, then immediately wished she hadn’t because the movement exposed the scar on her left wrist. She saw his eyes flick there anyway, and the old sting of being known surged up with embarrassing force. “You always hated when I went vague,” he said. “I hated when you lied.” Silas cleared his throat behind the bar with impeccable timing and no shame at all. “If you two intend to reenact your adolescence, do it away from my floor. Rory, your soup is signing a waiver of liability every minute it sits there.” Rory barked a laugh before she could stop herself. The sound loosened something in her chest, just enough to let her breathe. “Right. Sorry.” She took the bag up and made as if to leave, but Ned said, “Could I buy you a drink?” The offer was ordinary. The question behind it wasn’t. Rory looked at him. Really looked. The haircut, the expensive coat worn like a uniform, the controlled posture of a man used to entering rooms where everyone had already decided what he was. The old Ned had had that same face only in outline, back when he still wore cheap trainers and argued about music in the university canteen, back when his hands were always ink-smudged or gesturing wildly over some impossible future. This version of him looked as though he’d traded all that volatility for polish and learned to call it wisdom. She didn’t know if she trusted him more or less for it. “You’re asking like we’re strangers,” she said. “We are, a little.” That stung because it was true. Silas set the drying glass down. “I’ll set you both something small. On the house if you don’t make me regret it.” “Noble as ever,” Rory muttered. She let Ned lead her to the booth by the window. The rain drew long silvery lines down the glass, and beyond it Soho moved in its usual restless blur, headlights and umbrellas and people passing one another without looking up. Rory slid into the seat opposite him, placing the delivery bag beside her leg as if she might need the weight of it. Up close, she could see the age more clearly: the fine lines around his eyes, the tiredness tucked beneath them, the way one side of his mouth pulled slightly lower than the other when he stopped smiling. There was a cut across his knuckle, freshly scabbed. He smelled faintly of cold air and expensive soap. “London suits you,” he said. “You have no idea what suits me.” His gaze held hers for a beat too long. “No. I suppose I don’t.” Silas arrived with two small tumblers of whiskey and, because he was incapable of anything uncomplicated, a plate of salted nuts he set down between them with solemnity. “I’ll be in back.” “You don’t need to—” Rory began. “I do,” he said, and left with a slight limp that had softened but not vanished. For a moment neither of them spoke. Rory stared into her glass. The whiskey caught the low light and went the color of old honey. She thought of her flat above the bar, the sagging mattress, the radiator that clicked through the night, the life she had assembled from whatever she could carry alone. Cardiff felt very far away these days, though not far enough to become harmless. Ned rested one hand near his glass but did not lift it. “I heard you left.” “That’s not a question.” “It’s what people said.” “People say plenty.” He gave the smallest nod. “True.” Rory looked up. “Who did you hear it from?” His expression shifted again, careful and unreadable. “A mutual acquaintance.” “Eva,” she said, because no one else would have been that blunt. “Of course.” At that, his gaze dropped briefly to the table. “Yes.” Rory swallowed. There it was: the thread of old life pulling tight under the table between them, all the names she had tried not to say out loud for years. Cardiff. Evan. Eva. The flat with the damp patch near the ceiling. The humiliating smallness of being watched too closely. The long nights when leaving felt like theft and survival in equal measure. “You could have called,” she said. “I did.” “Once.” “You changed your number.” “You sent one message.” “And you didn’t answer.” Rory gave a short, humorless laugh. “That sounds fair, coming from you.” His jaw tightened. “I deserved that.” That surprised her more than an argument would have. She looked at him and saw, beneath the unfamiliar polish, the ghost of the boy who’d used to meet her in the library with her notes and his borrowed cigarettes, who’d grin when she was clever and pretend not to be intimidated by how fast she thought. That boy had once seemed incapable of saying anything true unless it hurt. “What are you doing here, really?” she asked quietly. He took a slow breath. “You’d laugh.” “Try me.” “I work in risk analysis now.” Rory blinked. Then she did laugh, once, in spite of herself. “That’s criminally boring.” “I know.” “You?” “I know.” The corner of his mouth lifted, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes. He wrapped his fingers around the glass at last, turning it slightly. “I suppose you could say I got tired of chaos.” The words landed with a strange heaviness. Rory looked at him hard. “That’s a new answer.” “It’s a true one.” She thought of the person she had been when they knew each other best: angry, clever, trying to be unbreakable and failing in private. She thought of the person she had become after London, after fleeing with one suitcase and no coherent plan, after building a life in increments small enough not to attract attention. Tired of chaos. She understood that, maybe better than she wanted to. “And you?” he asked. “Still delivering food and collecting strangers’ secrets?” “I don’t collect secrets.” “Silas lets you live above a bar. You collect something.” “That is deeply unfair.” “Is it?” She opened her mouth, then closed it. The whiskey warmed her throat when she drank. It tasted of smoke and caramel and something faintly bitter at the end. For a while they spoke in the careful way of people walking around a collapsed floorboard. He told her, in fragments, that he’d spent years in Manchester, then Glasgow, then overseas. She heard the places and made no comment, understanding that each one might be true in one sense and false in another. He asked about her flat, her work, whether she was still drawing in the margins of receipts the way she used to when she was bored in lectures. She denied that with offense she no longer felt. “You always did that thing,” she said finally. “Making a question sound like an apology.” He looked down at the whiskey. “Did I?” “Yes.” “Maybe I’m still doing it.” “Maybe.” The rain thickened against the window. Around them the bar carried on, indifferent and intimate. Glasses clinked. Someone swore at the jukebox. Silas’s voice drifted from the back room, low and dry, then vanished again. Rory felt the odd pressure of time around them, the sense that they were both standing in the same place and not the same place at all. At last she said, because the silence had become too full, “You look older.” Ned gave a short, genuine laugh at that. “That’s usually how it goes.” “I mean it.” “I know.” He rubbed a thumb along the rim of the glass. “So do you.” Rory should have bristled. Instead she felt a bleak tenderness. Older, yes. But not only older. Sharper in some places. Flatter in others. As if time had taken a file to them both, sanding away the easy edges and leaving what survived more honest, if less kind. “There were things I wanted to say,” he said. Her fingers tightened around her glass. “You’re saying them now.” “Not the right ones.” “No,” she said. “Probably not.” He nodded once. The silence that followed was not empty. It was crowded with all the versions of them that had lived and died without witnesses. Then Ned said, very quietly, “I’m sorry.” Rory stared at him. Not because she had never imagined hearing it. She had. Many times. In the middle of arguments, in the shower, on sleepless nights where the ceiling blurred and she rehearsed the exact shape of vindication. But imagined apologies had always come with a power she could control. This one was loose in the world, imperfect and unpolished and already too late. “For what?” she asked, though she knew there was no simple answer. He didn’t look away. “For not knowing how to stay. For thinking wanting something was the same as being able to keep it. For disappearing in the ways people do when they tell themselves they’re being decent.” Rory felt the words in her ribs more than her ears. They weren’t enough. They could never be enough. But they were also more than she had expected from him, and that made them dangerous. She looked down at her wrist, at the crescent scar that had whitened with age. Childhood accident, her mother used to call it, as if naming pain softly could change its shape. She flexed her hand once, feeling the old tightness. “I’m not waiting for anything from you,” she said. “I know.” That was the cruelest part, perhaps. He did know. He had come too late to be forgiven in the old way. Whatever this was, it had to exist without redemption. Rory lifted her glass again and drank. The whiskey burned cleanly this time. When she set it down, Ned was watching her with an expression she could not fully read, something like grief disciplined into courtesy. “You happy?” he asked. The question landed with a dull thud because it was too large for the booth, too large for any room with a jukebox and rain on the window and Silas in the back pretending not to listen. Rory thought of her flat above the bar, of the smell of garlic and paper bags, of Eva’s voice on the phone, of the quiet mornings when no one was knocking at the door and she could believe, for a little while, that peace was simply the absence of danger. Happiness felt like a word with too many weights attached. “Mostly,” she said at last. It was not a lie. It was not the whole truth either. Ned nodded as if that were answer enough. Maybe it was. The bar lights hummed overhead. On the wall behind him, a black-and-white photograph of men in uniform had faded into ghosts with faces like weathered stone. Rory looked at it, then back at him, and felt the years between them not as a gap but as a current, something cold and forceful moving underneath whatever remained. When she stood to leave, he stood as well. For a second they were close enough that she could see the small scar at the edge of his jaw, the faint fatigue around his eyes, the steadiness he’d bought at some private cost. He looked like someone who had survived himself. “I should go,” she said. “Of course.” She picked up the delivery bag. He reached as if to touch her arm, then stopped short, his hand hovering in the air between them before falling back to his side. Neither of them smiled this time. At the doorway, Rory turned once more. Ned was still by the booth, the whiskey untouched now, his reflection broken in the rain-dark glass. He raised two fingers in a small, old gesture she remembered from train stations and bad decisions and young lives that had once seemed permanent. She let herself answer with a nod and nothing else. Outside, the neon sign threw green light onto the wet pavement. Rory stepped back into the rain with the delivery bag against her hip and the strange, aching sense that something had not ended so much as finally become visible. The city moved around her, vast and indifferent, and she walked into it with her shoulders squared, carrying the taste of whiskey, the echo of her name in an old voice, and the quiet, unglamorous weight of all the years that had passed without permission.
created_at"2026-03-18T10:42:26.959Z" 3/18/2026, 10:42:26 AM
model"openai/gpt-5.4-mini-20260317"
app_id182717
external_user(null)
streamedtrue
cancelledfalse
latency2869
moderation_latency(null)
generation_time19869
tokens_prompt867
tokens_completion4720
native_tokens_prompt808
native_tokens_completion3781
native_tokens_completion_images0
native_tokens_reasoning49
native_tokens_cached0
num_media_prompt(null)
num_input_audio_prompt(null)
num_media_completion0
num_search_results(null)
origin"https://ncbench.com/"
is_byokfalse
finish_reason"stop"
native_finish_reason"completed"
usage0.0176205
router(null)
provider_responses
0
endpoint_id"9ee065b2-3d1c-43bc-bdd7-28af3b148282"
id"resp_013c9730dad3d2110169ba819303f08195a4bca14e2519789d"
is_byokfalse
latency181
model_permaslug"openai/gpt-5.4-mini-20260317"
provider_name"OpenAI"
status200
user_agent"langchainjs-openai/1.0.0 ((node/v24.14.0; linux; x64))"
http_referer(null)
api_type"completions"
id"gen-1773830546-rcvuTsjK4rKAmkKcDWXf"
upstream_id"resp_013c9730dad3d2110169ba819303f08195a4bca14e2519789d"
total_cost0.0176205
cache_discount(null)
upstream_inference_cost0
provider_name"OpenAI"

Evaluation details

Result Evaluator Details Meta Data
100.00% Adverbs in dialogue tags
Target: ≤10% dialogue tags with adverbs
totalTags31
adverbTagCount2
adverbTags
0"she asked quietly [quietly]"
1"she said finally [finally]"
dialogueSentences95
tagDensity0.326
leniency0.653
rawRatio0.065
effectiveRatio0.042
81.68% AI-ism adverb frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism adverbs (58 tracked)
wordCount3003
totalAiIsmAdverbs11
found
0
adverb"truly"
count1
1
adverb"quickly"
count1
2
adverb"slightly"
count3
3
adverb"very"
count3
4
adverb"really"
count2
5
adverb"softly"
count1
highlights
0"truly"
1"quickly"
2"slightly"
3"very"
4"really"
5"softly"
100.00% AI-ism character names
Target: 0 AI-default names (16 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions
0"Blackwood"
found(empty)
100.00% AI-ism location names
Target: 0 AI-default location names (33 tracked, −20% each)
codexExemptions(empty)
found(empty)
73.36% AI-ism word frequency
Target: <2% AI-ism words (290 tracked)
wordCount3003
totalAiIsms16
found
0
word"warmth"
count1
1
word"glinting"
count1
2
word"weight"
count3
3
word"charm"
count2
4
word"flicker"
count1
5
word"eyebrow"
count1
6
word"tension"
count1
7
word"pulse"
count1
8
word"unreadable"
count1
9
word"silence"
count2
10
word"tenderness"
count1
11
word"echo"
count1
highlights
0"warmth"
1"glinting"
2"weight"
3"charm"
4"flicker"
5"eyebrow"
6"tension"
7"pulse"
8"unreadable"
9"silence"
10"tenderness"
11"echo"
100.00% Cliché density
Target: ≤1 cliche(s) per 800-word window
totalCliches0
maxInWindow0
found(empty)
highlights(empty)
100.00% Emotion telling (show vs. tell)
Target: ≤3% sentences with emotion telling
emotionTells0
narrationSentences209
matches(empty)
100.00% Filter word density
Target: ≤3% sentences with filter/hedge words
filterCount2
hedgeCount0
narrationSentences209
filterMatches
0"look"
1"feel"
hedgeMatches(empty)
100.00% Gibberish response detection
Target: ≤1% gibberish-like sentences (hard fail if a sentence exceeds 800 words)
analyzedSentences273
gibberishSentences0
adjustedGibberishSentences0
longSentenceCount0
runOnParagraphCount0
giantParagraphCount0
wordSaladCount0
repetitionLoopCount0
controlTokenCount0
maxSentenceWordsSeen50
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Markdown formatting overuse
Target: ≤5% words in markdown formatting
markdownSpans0
markdownWords0
totalWords3001
ratio0
matches(empty)
100.00% Missing dialogue indicators (quotation marks)
Target: ≤10% speech attributions without quotation marks
totalAttributions38
unquotedAttributions0
matches(empty)
83.33% Name drop frequency
Target: ≤1.0 per-name mentions per 100 words
totalMentions66
wordCount2561
uniqueNames13
maxNameDensity1.05
worstName"Rory"
maxWindowNameDensity2.5
worstWindowName"Rory"
discoveredNames
Raven2
Nest2
Yu-Fei1
Rory27
Silas11
Ned12
Don1
Eva3
Soho1
London1
Manchester1
Glasgow1
Cardiff3
persons
0"Raven"
1"Nest"
2"Yu-Fei"
3"Rory"
4"Silas"
5"Ned"
6"Eva"
places
0"Soho"
1"London"
2"Manchester"
3"Glasgow"
4"Cardiff"
globalScore0.973
windowScore0.833
19.28% Narrator intent-glossing
Target: ≤2% narration sentences with intent-glossing patterns
analyzedSentences153
glossingSentenceCount8
matches
0"felt like theft and survival in equal m"
1"seemed incapable of saying anything true unless it hurt"
2"quite reach his eyes"
3"as if naming pain softly could change its shape"
4"something like grief disciplined into courte"
5"felt like a word with too many weights"
6"looked like someone who had survived hims"
7"seemed permanent"
100.00% "Not X but Y" pattern overuse
Target: ≤1 "not X but Y" per 1000 words
totalMatches1
per1kWords0.333
wordCount3001
matches
0"not as a gap but as a current, something cold"
100.00% Overuse of "that" (subordinate clause padding)
Target: ≤2% sentences with "that" clauses
thatCount2
totalSentences273
matches
0"fragments, that he’d"
1"understanding that each"
100.00% Paragraph length variance
Target: CV ≥0.5 for paragraph word counts
totalParagraphs139
mean21.59
std24.63
cv1.141
sampleLengths
0102
115
23
320
473
55
618
788
821
99
1013
1137
127
1375
141
158
1650
174
1879
1985
202
217
223
2330
2416
2513
2632
271
282
2924
3026
3110
3242
3316
3441
359
365
3743
3824
3920
409
4193
4212
437
444
456
4622
475
4864
4955
100.00% Passive voice overuse
Target: ≤2% passive sentences
passiveCount1
totalSentences209
matches
0"was bored"
100.00% Past progressive (was/were + -ing) overuse
Target: ≤2% past progressive verbs
pastProgressiveCount5
totalVerbs422
matches
0"was thinking"
1"was laughing"
2"was still drawing"
3"was watching"
4"was knocking"
100.00% Em-dash & semicolon overuse
Target: ≤2% sentences with em-dashes/semicolons
emDashCount2
semicolonCount2
flaggedSentences3
totalSentences273
ratio0.011
matches
0"Old maps climbed the walls in cracked frames; black-and-white photographs peered down from above the bottles like family portraits of ghosts."
1"Not silent—bars never truly went silent—but thinned, as if the noise had stepped back to make room for something else."
2"He was older, of course; they both were."
88.05% Purple prose (modifier overload)
Target: <4% adverbs, <2% -ly adverbs, no adj stacking
wordCount2572
adjectiveStacks0
stackExamples(empty)
adverbCount138
adverbRatio0.053654743390357695
lyAdverbCount35
lyAdverbRatio0.013608087091757388
100.00% Repeated phrase echo
Target: ≤20% sentences with echoes (window: 2)
totalSentences273
echoCount0
echoWords(empty)
100.00% Sentence length variance
Target: CV ≥0.4 for sentence word counts
totalSentences273
mean10.99
std9.43
cv0.858
sampleLengths
024
145
233
315
43
515
65
710
819
922
1022
115
1218
1311
1421
1512
1610
1713
1821
197
2014
219
2213
2317
2420
257
2633
278
2814
2920
301
318
326
3325
3419
354
3619
3724
3810
3917
409
419
4217
4318
449
4520
4612
472
487
493
44.51% Sentence opener variety
Target: ≥60% unique sentence openers
consecutiveRepeats15
diversityRatio0.27472527472527475
totalSentences273
uniqueOpeners75
100.00% Adverb-first sentence starts
Target: ≥3% sentences starting with an adverb
adverbCount6
totalSentences183
matches
0"Then his mouth parted slightly,"
1"Instead, he had gone pale"
2"Then she did laugh, once,"
3"Instead she felt a bleak"
4"Then Ned said, very quietly,"
5"Maybe it was."
ratio0.033
71.37% Pronoun-first sentence starts
Target: ≤30% sentences starting with a pronoun
pronounCount68
totalSentences183
matches
0"She was thinking about that"
1"He wore his usual dark"
2"His left leg took a"
3"He was older, of course;"
4"His profile caught under the"
5"Her fingers tightened on the"
6"He saw her a second"
7"His expression changed so quickly"
8"He had looked at her"
9"She had wanted him to"
10"He had the controlled stillness"
11"His left hand rested on"
12"He only wiped the same"
13"He smiled then, and the"
14"It was smaller, edged with"
15"She softened it with an"
16"He nodded once, as if"
17"He had always been better"
18"he asked, glancing past her"
19"She heard the dryness in"
ratio0.372
69.29% Subject-first sentence starts
Target: ≤72% sentences starting with a subject
subjectCount143
totalSentences183
matches
0"The green neon sign above"
1"Rory came in under it"
2"She was thinking about that"
3"Silas looked up from behind"
4"Rory peeled the delivery ticket"
5"Silas’s mouth twitched, the closest"
6"The light above him caught"
7"He wore his usual dark"
8"His left leg took a"
9"Rory pushed damp hair back"
10"The Raven’s Nest was the"
11"The low lamps made everyone"
12"Someone near the jukebox was"
13"Silas slid her payment across"
14"Rory snorted, then paused because"
15"A man had turned in"
16"He was older, of course;"
17"His profile caught under the"
18"Her fingers tightened on the"
19"He saw her a second"
ratio0.781
81.97% Subordinate conjunction sentence starts
Target: ≥2% sentences starting with a subordinating conjunction
subConjCount3
totalSentences183
matches
0"Now he was older in"
1"As if he, too, had"
2"As if time had taken"
ratio0.016
72.98% Technical jargon density
Target: ≤6% sentences with technical-jargon patterns
analyzedSentences92
technicalSentenceCount9
matches
0"The low lamps made everyone look as though they were already half-remembered."
1"From the back, beyond the bookshelf that hid the secret room, came the faint murmur of voices she couldn’t make out."
2"Rory slid into the seat opposite him, placing the delivery bag beside her leg as if she might need the weight of it."
3"She thought of her flat above the bar, the sagging mattress, the radiator that clicked through the night, the life she had assembled from whatever she could car…"
4"She looked at him and saw, beneath the unfamiliar polish, the ghost of the boy who’d used to meet her in the library with her notes and his borrowed cigarettes,…"
5"As if time had taken a file to them both, sanding away the easy edges and leaving what survived more honest, if less kind."
6"Childhood accident, her mother used to call it, as if naming pain softly could change its shape."
7"He reached as if to touch her arm, then stopped short, his hand hovering in the air between them before falling back to his side."
8"The city moved around her, vast and indifferent, and she walked into it with her shoulders squared, carrying the taste of whiskey, the echo of her name in an ol…"
100.00% Useless dialogue additions
Target: ≤5% dialogue tags with trailing filler fragments
totalTags31
uselessAdditionCount0
matches(empty)
100.00% Dialogue tag variety (said vs. fancy)
Target: ≤10% fancy dialogue tags
totalTags23
fancyCount1
fancyTags
0"Rory muttered (mutter)"
dialogueSentences95
tagDensity0.242
leniency0.484
rawRatio0.043
effectiveRatio0.021
89.5274%